BANDxBodyguard
by may10baby
Summary: Naruto and Kyuubi are members of a famous band called the Bad Ass Night Demons. After a near gangrape their manager hires a group of bodyguards for them, but these aren’t normal bodyguards, they're from the perverted group called Akatsuki! full sum inside
1. The Red High Heels

May: Oh noes! May, a ROCKER fanfic? Damn straight!

Summary: Singer Kyuubi and Guitarist Naruto are members of a famous performing group called B.A.N.D. Bad Ass Night Demons, after a near gang-rape the teens' manager and father order up a pair of personal bodyguards for them, but these aren't normal bodyguards, they'rea group of perverts! ItaKyuu. Sasunaru, GaaLee, SasoDei, side pairings include Akatcest and others

Cause I want this fic to be mainly ItaKyuu, populate the fan base!

Also, I'm going to Otakon, this year! Anyone else going?! XD Also! Itachi cosplayers, find Kyuubi cosplayers and make out! And e-mail me pictures, lolz. RESEARCH!

Naruto: 16

Kyuubi: 19

Sasuke: 17

Itachi: 21

Gaara: 17

Lee: 16

Shuukaku: 18

Deidara: 20

Sasori: 22

* * *

"OMG, Ino, did you hear?! B.A.N.D. almost got gang-raped by a bunch of fangirls!" a pink-haired girl in a pink halter top with denim jeans and black flip flops informed her blonde-haired friend in a white blouse and jean skirt with brown sandals.

"No way, Sakura, are you kidding?!" Ino replied, thunderstruck. "Don't they have like, bodyguards or something?" she wondered.

"Apparently not before the near-rape, but now they're getting some…we should apply!" Sakura added excitedly, before she remembered "fuck, I forgot, no women allowed…" she muttered. Ino rolled her eyes.

"No shit? Poor Kyuubi-sama'll have a fit!" she giggled. "And can you believe someone tried to rape innocent little Naruto-sama'll?!"

"And how the hell did they pin down Gaara-sama or Shuukaku-sama?" Sakura wondered.

"Sakura. These are fangirls here." Sakura sweatdropped.

"Ah, right…"

* * *

"Daddy, I love you, very much…but as lead singer of B.A.N.D, I swear to God, if you shove one of those thick skinned gorillas on me, I will scream myself hoarse!" Kyuubi warned. The teen's long red hair was undone and tumbled down his shoulders to his waist like a waterfall of blood, his matching set of ruby eyes glittered dangerously as he glared at his father, Minato with malicious intent. He was dressed in a black tank top and form-fitting, cream-colored jeans with a few tears marring the knees.

The two were currently battling it out in the B.A.N.D. manor/recording studio.

Minato sighed. The blonde-haired, blue-eyed looked at his eldest child wearily. He was dressed in a blue dress shirt and faded jeans. "Kyuubi-chan, I understand how independent you like to be, but after that little fiasco I'm afraid I have no choice, but I assure you, your new bodyguard won't be a 'thick skinned gorillas' as you put it, in fact, they're the children of some close friends of mine-"

"Children?! Did I hear plural?! I'm getting _two _gorillas?!"

"One for you, the others for Naruto and the others, along with some spares, and you're getting a bodyguard-" Kyuubi glared at Minato darkly.

"Try me."

"-Or I go and tell your mother about that one time you came home with a-"

"Alright, alright! Fuck, old man, you're a sadist."

"No cursing!" Minato snapped, smacking Kyuubi upside the head. "Your bodyguards'll be here in a few days., until then, try not to leave the house!" Kyuubi rolled his eyes.

"Uhuh, uhuh." '_Like hell_' Inner Kyuubi added on, fox tails waving devilishly.

"I'm serious Kyuubi, or your mother will find out about that one time when you left the manor and went-"

"Oh my God! I hate you!" Kyuubi snarled, twisting around and leaving the room, slamming the door shut behind him.

Minato leaned back in his chair, heaving another sigh "Why can't he be like Naruto..?"

* * *

Several Days Later

"Kyuu-nii, Kyuu-nii, Kyuu-nii, Kyuu-nii, Kyuu-nii, Kyuu-nii, Kyuu-nii, Kyuu-nii, Kyu-"

"**WHAT?**" Kyuubi grit out, dressed in a loose black tunic and tight, dark brown capris (lolz).

"…Are our bodyguards mean?" Naruto asked. The blonde, blue-eyes boy was dressed in an orange hoody with black shorts, sitting on the couch next to his brother. Naruto stared at his brother innocently, tilting his head to the side. Kyuubi's eye twitched before he threw the magazine he was reading against the opposite wall.

"I DON'T KNOW! JESUS CHRIST! I DON'T CARE EITHER! THOSE MOTHERFUCKING GORRILLAS CAN TRY AND KEEP UP WITH ME!" Kyuubi screamed, jumping up and stomping to the door of the den. "…And don't cry, it's not your fault." He clipped to a teary Naruto before stepping out.

Naruto sniffled, wiping at his eyes. "But you yelled at me…" he whined to no one in particular.

"Naruto…" a calm voice muttered. Naruto blinked away a few more tears.

"Eh? What is it, Gaara?" he asked the red-haired bass player. Gaara was dressed in a black muscle shirt and matching jeans, he was sitting on the beige carpet floor with his back to the wall, a book in his hands.

Gaara rolled his eyes. "He's just pissed off cause some leech is going to stick to us all the time now." Gaara's older brother, Shuukaku, snorted.

The tan-haired, purple streaked, drummer grinned, dressed in a purple tank top and white jeans sat on the white leather couch near Gaara. "Please…they might be able to stick to Naru-chan, but Kyuu-kun'll give 'em a run for their money, me too." He added, looking to Gaara "You?" Gaara gave him a look as to say 'No shit?'

Naruto pouted "I dun wanna a leech sticking to me!" he whined, tearing up again.

Gaara and Shuukaku sweatdropped '_Here we go again..._' they thought in unison.

* * *

"This the place?" a young voice muttered.

"Yes, little brother, it is." An older sounding, highly amused voice answered. "Okay team, the voice continued. "Be warned, the red head with long hair has a flash temper and smacks like a bitch when you've just bought the last pair of the shoes she wanted."

The group flinched.

"**The red high heels**."

"Shit! Do we have to do this, yeah?!" a scared voice with a speech impairment whimpered.

"The pay's noticeable." A calm voice stated.

"Anyway." The amused voice continued "The shorter red head doesn't sleep, hence the reason we brought "it"." He shuddered.

"Yosh!" "It" cried.

"Shut UP." The group snapped.

"The blonde with purple streaks isn't as bad as either red head, but he's still formidable."

"Uhuh."

"And the last person, also blonde, no streaks is-"

"-so kawaii!" the first voice cooed.

"…Little brother, enjoy." The once amused voice sighed.

"Shanaro!"

"…That's it?"

"Yup."

"Then ring the goddamn bell, we've been out here for ten minutes!" a voice snapped irritably.

"No bad language around the kawaii blonde." The first voice snapped.

* * *

Kyuubi glared darkly as the front door rang. Why did everything have to stand in between him and his goddamn room!? He stomped up to the door and yanked it open.

"Get the fuck away!" he snarled, slamming the door shut, not even looking at the stunned group of people outside his home. He spun around and successfully stomped up the first few stairs before Minato ran into the Grand Hall.

"…Flash temper red head? Un?" a muffled voice behind the door asked.

"Yup."

"He's lucky he's so cute."

"**Mine.**"

"Kyuubi, who was that?!" Minato asked breathlessly. Kyuubi gave him a dark look.

"…Salesman." He snapped. Minato rolled his eyes, walking to the front door and opening it.

"I'm sor- Oh! It's you! Everyone! Gather!" Minato called, Naruto, Gaara and Shuukaku walking into the room. Kyuubi huffed, leaning against the carved staircase railing, folding his arms over his chest.

"What is it, Daddy?" Naruto asked. Minato smiled, pulling open the door.

"Your new bodyguards!" Minato replied cheerfully.

Naruto and Gaara blinked.

Shuukaku stared.

And Kyuubi flat out gaped.

"Uchiha?!" Kyuubi shrieked, jumping off the staircase and walking up to the amused brunette.

Itachi's long black hair was tied in the typical loose ponytail, his blood red eyes narrowed in amused at Kyuubi's shocked face. He was dressed in a red blazer and a black dress shirt with the first button undone, the collar flipped up and a pair of black slacks.

"Long time no see, Kyuu-chan." Itachi greeted in a clearly 'bed voice' manner. Kyuubi blinked before giving out another yell and attempting to shove Itachi back out the door.

And at a head shorter with a slimmer frame and much less muscle, he failed.

"Out! Out! OUT!" Kyuubi screamed, pulling back and attempting to ram his foot into Itachi's stomach. The Uchiha quickly caught the flying foot by the ankle.

"Same as ever…" the Uchiha muttered, sharply jerking the foot up, causing Kyuubi to lose his balance and fall onto his back with a grunt.

Naruto, Gaara and Shuukaku stared.

Minato looked peachy keen.

No one had ever managed to pin Kyuubi…ever…beside those fangirls, but that was an army, people. But this one guy did it, with one hand?!

Shuukaku gulped, studying the rest of the group, hoping the others weren't as strong as this guy. '_This could be harder than I thought…_';

Some mini-version of the first guy with a chicken-ass hair style in a black hoody and cargo pants.

A blonde, gender confused man, woman, something, in a red t-shirt with white long sleeves underneath and black, skater jeans.

A red-haired guy in a black t-shirt, red vest and black slacks.

And…Shuukaku blinked from the sudden assault on his vision. A green…thing…with a bowl cut and huge eyebrows was grinned brightly at the group.

Suddenly, Chicken Boy took a step forward. Shuukaku and Gaara blinked, glancing at Naruto who'd taken a step back.

Chicken Boy stepped forward.

Naruto stepped back.

Suddenly, Naruto turned tail and sprinted up the staircase, Chicken Boy shooting up after him.

"Leave me alone, Sukebe!!(1)" Naruto screamed, flailing his arms, reaching the top of the staircase and turning to the corner to the hallway where his room was seconds before "Sukebe" himself.

"Ah…" Gaara sweatdropped, blinking as a bright green filled his vision.

"Yosh! Gaara-san! My name is Rock Lee and it's an honor to be guarding you from the evil in this world! Please, allow me to pledge my life for your protection as such is an expression of YOUTH!!" Lee stated, bowing to the red head.

"…the fuck?" Gaara stared at the bowing Green…Thingy before following Naruto's great example and mad sprinting to his room.

Lee blinked, straightening, watching as Gaara reached the top of the staircase.

"GAARA-SAAAAANNNNN! I NEED YOU TO ACCEPT MY PLEDGE OF PROTECTIOOOONNNNNN!!" Lee cried, shooting up the staircase after the red head.

"Stay the hell away from me!"

Shuukaku looked at the last remaining members of the group.

The red head and blonde.

The red head sighed, looking at Shuukaku, who flinched. "Yo, the name's Sasori and this is my bitch, Deidara" he motioned at the pissed blonde next to him.

"Now wait just a-"

"We work together as a couple, now, if you don't sneak off and shit, the two of us are pretty flexible, but if we have to chase your ass around there'll be pain, got me?" Sasori raised a brow. Shuukaku nodded rapidly.

"I-I'll be upstairs…in my room…" Shuukaku stuttered, turning and running up the stairs.

"Danna! You're mean! Yeah!" Deidara whined. Minato sweatdropped, deciding now was a good time to play host.

"You guys hungry?" he asked.

"Hell yeah! Hmm!" Deidara cheered, throwing both hands in the air.

"Well, then, to the kitchen! Oh, by the way, where are Kisame and the others?" Minato asked, leading Sasori and Deidara.

"Kisame's cousin, Zabuza called and asked to borrow the Shark Man for a bit, Hidan, Kakuzu and Tobi went with him."

"Oh, Zabuza-san? Haku-kun's personal bodyguard?" Minato asked. Deidara nodded.

"If by Haku you mean the "Ultra Popular Super Pop Star Haku", then yes, you're right. Unn."

"Then what about Zetsu and the rest?"

"Protecting the president's kid." Sasori replied in a bored manner. Minato sweatdropped.

Itachi and Kyuubi barely noticed the lack of people in the hallway, the two were dead set on glaring at each other till the other wilted.

Kyuubi's feet were currently trying to slam into Itachi's crotch and Itachi's hands were currently preventing that.

"Let. Go." Kyuubi grit out.

"You relax your legs first." Itachi replied calmly. Kyuubi growled, relaxing his legs, Itachi released the red head's feet, taking a step back for safety purposes.

"Take your perverted brother, Green Blob, and company away!" Kyuubi huffed, standing up and turning to walk up the staircase. "And leave me alone!" he snapped. Itachi sighed, following Kyuubi to the stairwell. Kyuubi, a few steps above Itachi, turned and glared down at him. "Are you deaf?"

"Are you stupid? Wait, let me rephrase that." Itachi added sarcastically.

"Jerk!" Kyuubi shouted, turning and running up the stairs, before rounding the corner and running into his room, slamming the door behind him.

Itachi sighed, scratching his head in an annoyed manner. "Yes, you are stupid, Uchiha." He muttered.

* * *

1) Sukebe is translated to pervert in Japanese…or so a valuable source has informed me, lolz, SUKEbe, lolz

And on a completely random topic SaSUKE!

May: Yes, Itachi-sama, why are you stupid?...What? Do you seriously think I know? Well, maybe, but I'm not sharing such a secret yet!

And yes, ItaKyuuness shall be a little angsty, but that's what the side pairings are for!

And yes, Haku and B.A.N.D. are buddies, they've even done a few songs together, what songs you ask?...I'm working on it, I'm not meant to be a lyricist, despite my amazing ability to rework many classic songs such as "Oh where, oh where…" and "the itsy, bitsy spider." Lolz, if you haven't found those rewrites, then read my other fanfics!

**REVIEW FOR MAY-CHAN'S HAPPYNESS! **


	2. LUCHADORA!

May: Next chapter! Lolz, all I'm gonna say!

Previously:

_Itachi and Kyuubi barely noticed the lack of people in the hallway, the two were dead set on glaring at each other till the other wilted._

_Kyuubi's feet were currently trying to slam into Itachi's crotch and Itachi's hands were currently preventing that._

"_Let. Go." Kyuubi grit out._

"_You relax your legs first." Itachi replied calmly. Kyuubi growled, relaxing his legs, Itachi released the red head's feet, taking a step back for safety purposes._

"_Take your perverted brother, Green Blob, and company away!" Kyuubi huffed, standing up and turning to walk up the staircase. "And leave me alone!" he snapped. Itachi sighed, following Kyuubi to the stairwell. Kyuubi, a few steps above Itachi, turned and glared down at him. "Are you deaf?"_

"_Are you stupid? Wait, let me rephrase that." Itachi added sarcastically._

"_Jerk!" Kyuubi shouted, turning and running up the stairs, before rounding the corner and running into his room, slamming the door behind him._

_Itachi sighed, scratching his head in an annoyed manner. "Yes, you are stupid, Uchiha." He muttered._

* * *

Naruto sat on his bed, curled into a ball and crying. Sasuke sighed, petting the blonde on the back.

"I'm sorry…" he apologized, stroking the blonde's hair. "I was so excited to see you again…" he stated, smiling at the blonde gently.

Naruto sniffled, not looking at the Uchiha "It hurts!" he wailed, curling into a small ball. Sasuke sweatdropped.

"I'm sure it does, it looked like you hit the bed post rather hard." He frowned, tilting the blonde's chin up to examine the swelling bump on his forehead.

Naruto glared at Uchiha. "If you hadn't been chasing me, I wouldn't have tripped and hit my head! Sasuke no Sukebe!" Naruto wailed. Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"I can't hug my adorable Naru-chan?" he muttered in annoyance.

"No!" Naruto pouted. Sasuke sulked.

* * *

"Kyuubi? Kyuubi, open up." Itachi ordered, knocking on the red head's door. He sighed, trying the knob, only to find it locked. "Kyuubi…I'm coming in." he warned, pulling out a pen from his pocket before unscrewing said pen and revealing a small bunch of thin metal wires bent at certain places. Picking two, he inserted them into the door, jiggling the wires a bit, before turning the wires, the door knob turning with them until a click was heard. (such an interesting ability)

Itachi opened the newly unlocked door and entered the room, blinking as he took in the open window with a rope ladder hanging off of it.

He sighed, scratching his ear in thought before turning around and walking back out the door.

* * *

"Dammit, Izumo! Gimme another!" Kyuubi huffed, setting the newly emptied glass back onto the counter with a heavy thud. He was dressed in tight black jeans and a matching tank top.

Izumo glanced at his fellow bartender Kotetsu before sighing "Kyuubi-kun, that's enough, that's already three more than usual, you're going to pass out…" Kyuubi groaned.

"To hell with it!" he shouted, lunging at the bottles behind the bar, but Izumo caught him quickly.

"Kyuubi-kun…" Izumo stated firmly "You should go home."

"I can't! That bastard's over there!" Kyuubi whined, face flushed. Izumo blinked.

"Bastard?"

"He totally broke my heart without a word! No words! As a singer, do you know what that's like?!" Kyuubi wailed. Izumo sweatdropped.

"Uh, no…" he admitted. Kyuubi shook his head from side to side wildly.

"It's like being taken to a bar when you can't drink! And left with the tab! That bastard just up and left me! He didn't even say anything, it wasn't until I found out that his royal genius graduated early did I figure out what happened! And my brother had to tell me! The bastard couldn't even tell me first!" Kyuubi shrieked, pounding his fists onto the table. Izumo sweatdropped.

"I'm sure he had his reasons…" he replied calmly.

"BULLSHIT!" Kyuubi shouted, several other bar patrons looking at him in annoyance. "That bastard's just a one-time, slut loving- Mmmph! Nnn?!" Kyuubi stared at the hand covering his mouth.

"Enough." Itachi growled, hoisting the red head to his feet. The Uchiha was dressed in gray camo cargo pants and a black muscle shirt with a leather jacket on top of that. Kyuubi broke free before wobbling dangerously, only to have Itachi catch him again. Itachi looked at Izumo. "How much?" he asked, Izumo just rolled his eyes.

"Just get him out of here." He replied. Itachi smirked, grabbing the red head by the waist with one hand and tossing Kyuubi's arm over his shoulders.

"Let's go." Itachi told Kyuubi, glaring at him when he tried to protest. Izumo watched as Itachi more or less dragged Kyuubi out the door.

"…I wonder if that was the bastard…"

* * *

"Damn..! Let me go!" Kyuubi huffed, shoving the Uchiha away before doubling over against an alleyway wall and spilling out his stomach's contents.

Itachi wrinkled his nose at the smell of bile. "Try to get it all out at once, please." He asked the puking teen.

"Dammit…" Kyuubi coughed, wiping his mouth on his hand. "Leave…me the fuck alone…" he straighten slightly, ignoring the nasty taste in his mouth.

Itachi rolled his eyes. "Come on." He reached out for the redhead, but Kyuubi shook him off.

"Fuck off or I'll puke all over your shoes" Kyuubi snapped, staggering forward a bit before leaning back against the brick wall. Itachi rolled his eyes, taking out his cell phone.

"Fine then, I'll just call your da-" he blinked when he felt the red head latch onto his arm.

"No! Don't do that!" Kyuubi wailed, clinging to the Uchiha "Uchiha! I'll kill you!" he shrieked, blindly grabbing for the cell that Itachi was calmly holding above their heads. "Give me!" he shouted, yanking on Itachi's arm, twisting his body around the Uchiha to stop him from moving.

Itachi's breath hitched when Kyuubi's lips pressed against his neck.

"Dammit, Itachi! Give it to me!" Kyuubi whined into the brunette's ear. Itachi took a deep breath…

Before slamming Kyuubi against the wall, hard.

"Eep!" Kyuubi squeaked, staring wide-eyed at the brunette. Itachi took a deep breath.

"Unless you want a very, very sore ass, I suggest you stop that." Itachi warned, his voice low. Kyuubi made a noise similar to a cross between a cry and curse before scrambling out of the Uchiha's arms.

"Y-you have no right to say those kinds of things!" Kyuubi stuttered, backing away before spinning around and walking off, the near rape sobering him up magically as he hurried away.

Itachi rolled his eyes. "As if anyone else does…" he muttered, walking after the red head, pocketing his cell phone.

* * *

Kyuubi huffed and puffed, finally reaching his house, Itachi calmly walking up the steps behind to him. Kyuubi voted against the rope ladder back to his room, those extra drinks really take a lot out of you. He wearily reached the door and tried the handle, blinking in surprise when it opened.

"Huh?" he muttered, pushing the door open before gasping in shock. Itachi's eyes widened as the Uchiha walked inside the house after Kyuubi.

The completely _trashed _house he might add.

The Main Hallway itself was severely damaged, several cracks and holes shaped by brute force alone marring the marble staircase, the stairwell's railing was broken in the middle and the stairs themselves didn't look any better.

"Holy shit…" Kyuubi muttered, walking into the destroyed area. "What happened…" he looked around, before a bad thought hit him. "Oh no, Naru-chan! Baby brother!? Where are you!?" he called out frantically, spinning around is circles, looking for his brother. Itachi sweatdropped, glancing around idly.

"Relax, I having a feeling no one's serio-" he was abruptly caught off guard when he caught something moving rapidly to his left, he spun around and braced himself for any robber or attacker.

One thing he didn't expect was a female masked wrestler landing a roundhouse kick to the side of his face.

Kyuubi watched horror-struck as the masked woman caught a dazed Itachi by the waist, wrapping her arms around him and delivering a Vertical Suplex to the brunette.

Itachi hit the ground hard, coughing, his vision blurring. The demonic woman loomed over him, evil intent glinting in her eyes.

Kyuubi stared at the woman in mute shock. The scary woman's Lucha Libre (Masked Wrestling) mask was that of a standard white mask with a sea wave design and whirlpools decorating it at a hole at the back where a long red ponytail was poking out of to the woman's mid back.

The woman was wearing a tight, light blue bikini top that gradually grew darker till the bikini bottom resembled a dark blue. Calf high black boots were covering her feet, the rest of her skin bare to show the tone body and six pack.

Overall?

She looked damn good for a woman who had given birth to two kids, the first of them standing several feet away, staring on in shock.

"M-mommy?!" Kyuubi whimpered, fall back onto the ground and crawling away.

The woman wrestler undid her mask, flipping back her now free hair. Kushina briskly walked over to Kyuubi and hoisted him up before sniffing him.

"Why do I smell alcohol?!" she hissed, smacking Kyuubi upside the head, almost knocking him unconscious.

"I-I…" Kyuubi whimpered before fainting. Kushina rolled her eyes at how much of a pussy her eldest child could be.

"It's nigh-nigh time…" she muttered, dragging Kyuubi up to his room, not even bothering with Itachi.

* * *

The next morning when the Band and their Bodyguards met up in the kitchen. After a full explanation of what went on last night;

Kushina heard about her babies almost being raped and flew over from Mexico to tend to them. Arrived, found Sasuke in the process of attempting to seduce Naruto to his bedroom and all hell broke loose.

After snuggling a crying Naruto _after_ beating Sasuke to a pulp, said boy was currently sporting a broken arm and multiple lacerations and bruises. Then she went for the meat;

Uchiha Itachi, the son of a bastard that broke her baby Kyuu-chan's fragile heart.

However, not finding either her baby or her target she went and "thoroughly interrogated" everyone in the house (except Naruto) even resorting to climb onto the roof, in those boots, where Gaara and Shuukaku were hiding.

Still not finding any trace of Itachi or Kyuubi, she sat and waited…and waited…and waited some more, plotting Itachi's demise.

Everyone glared darkly at Itachi and Kyuubi, the two sweatdropped.

"Hey, I ended up like the rest of you." Itachi pointed at the bandage placed over the dark-colored bruise on his cheek.

"Yeah, but it's still your fault, where were you?" Sasori snapped, crossing his arms over his chest. A bandage was wrapped around his forehead, other than, nothing except bruises. Deidara looked fine with the except that his arm was in a sling, but no cast.

Gaara and Shuukaku nodded, looking for Kyuubi for an explanation, both of them covered in bruises.

"Umm…well, I…" Kyuubi muttered, looking to Itachi who rolled his eyes.

"I took him out." Itachi answered, glancing over at Kyuubi, smirk in place.

"W-wa-wah..?!" Kyuubi sputtered, backing away from the Uchiha in shock. "W-we…no…I..!" Kyuubi shook his head.

"…Well judging by the fact Kyuubi's acting like a virgin just asked to the Mansex Mamba, that must be it, good luck renewing your relationship." Sasori cheered flatly, Deidara giggled next to him.

"Thanks." Itachi replied sarcastically, Kyuubi having a spaz attack next to him.

"Mommy!" Naruto suddenly chirped. Everyone else tensed as Kushina walked in.

'_Oh, shit._'

* * *

May: Yup, there ya go, lolz. And yes I must admit, I was twitching to give Itachi a Suplex (as anyone with a Wrestler Kushina would) I'm sorry Itachi cosplayers (you know who you are) and fans (Dark Mican-chan)…but it was funny…and be glad such things don't happen in real life. Period…but I don't wish to be held responsible if a masked wrestler lady tackles you at a con –runs away-

Love ya allz! Please review for the sake of getting the 100th review, aka Kiriban! (such one-shots can be found in my story section)


	3. Oblivion

May: Second Update after my long ass Hiatus, XDDD

* * *

_After snuggling a crying Naruto after beating Sasuke to a pulp, said boy was currently sporting a broken arm and multiple lacerations and bruis__es. Then she meat for the meat;_

_Uchiha Itachi, the son of a whore that broke her baby Kyuu-chan's fragile heart._

_However, not finding either her baby or her target she went and "thoroughly interrogated" everyone in the house (except Naruto) even resorting to climb onto the roof, in those boots, where __Gaara and Shuukaku were hiding._

_Still not finding any trace of Itachi or Kyuubi, she sat and waited…and waited…and waited some more, plotting Itachi's demise._

_Everyone glared darkly at Itachi a__nd Kyuubi, to two sweatdropped._

"_Hey, I ended up like the rest of you." Itachi pointed at the bandage placed over the dark-colored bruise on his cheek._

"_Yeah, but it's still your fault, where were you?" Sasori snapped, crossing his arms over his chest. A bandage was wrapped around his forehead, other than, nothing except bruises. Deidara looked fine with the except that his a__rm was in a sling, but no cast._

_Gaara and Shuukaku nodded, looking for Kyuubi for an explanation, both of them covered in bruises._

"_Umm…well, I…" Kyuubi muttered, looking__ to Itachi who rolled his eyes._

"_I took him out." Itachi answered, glancing over at Kyuubi._

"_W-wa-wah..?!" Kyuubi sputtered, backing away from the Uchiha in shock. "W-we…__no…I..!" Kyuubi shook his head._

"…_Well judging by the fact Kyuubi's acting like a virgin just asked to the Mansex Mamba, that must be it, good luck renewing your relationship." Sasori cheered flatly, Deidara giggled next to him._

"_Thanks." Itachi replied sarcastically, Kyuubi ha__ving a spaz attack next to him._

"_Mommy!" Naruto suddenly chirped. Everyone else tensed as Kushina walked in._

'_Oh, shit.'_

* * *

Kushina merrily stepped in, kissing both Kyuubi and Naruto on the head before heading for a bagel.

"How's everyone this morning?" she asked, tossing the bagels in the toaster.

"Fine, Mommy!" Naruto chirped, skipping over to give Kushina the cream cheese. "How are you? I heard you hospitalized that other wrestler in the championship match."

Everyone else sweatdropped.

Kushina nodded. "He tried to cop a feel. I felt as though I should've had helped, after all, Daddy would have done even worse things to him."

Kyuubi lifted a brow. "I don't think Dad has it in him, Mom."

Kushina snorted. "DO I need to explain that your Dad was a Marine?"

"And he fought in the war and that's why he threatened to put a cap in my ass the second I ran off to become one?" Kyuubi added, ignoring the look Itachi gave him.

"Yes, quite right. Now, for the rest of you." Kushina turned and gave the group a look. "Because I feel sorry for beating you all bloody when **he**…" she sent Itachi, currently hiding behind Kyuubi, a flat look. "…was my target, I invite you all to when the B.A.N.D. records their singles, Masquerade and Oblivion!" she chirped, though her tone left no room for argument.

"How…kind of you, un." Deidara replied, peeking out of behind Sasori.

Kushina smiled at the blonde. "It's not a problem. None at all!"

"But, it's the band's recording, Mom, and I don't want Itachi there!" he huffed, crossing his arms.

"Oh, because of that one verse?" Shuukaku asked, grinning. "The one where--ARGH!" Kyuubi cut him off by dumping a bowl of cereal onto his head.

"Ah…my cereal…" Sasuke muttered, blinking when Kyuubi sent him a dark look. "I-It's fine, really!" he insisted, taking a step back.

"I'm curious about this verse…" Itachi noted, his lips twitching up.

"Go to hell." Kyuubi replied curtly, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Language. And they're going." Kushina stated, heading back out the door, bagel in hand. "Get ready, we'll be recording and then maybe I'm dragging the band out to go shopping!" she cried, pumping a fist in the air, exiting the room.

"…So, about this verse…" Itachi began, trailing off when Kyuubi pulled the cereal bowl out of Shuukaku's hand and waved it menacingly. "Let's get ready, guys, come on. Best not to keep the psycho woman waiting." Itachi stated mildly, clapping his hands together.

* * *

"Minato!" A white-haired man cheerfully called out, embracing the blonde-haired manager in a big hug. "How are you?" He boomed before looking at the mob of teens behind him. "Wow, with Kushina back I figured you didn't think you'd need them, but jeez." He nodded his head at Naruto and Kyuubi, the blonde smiled cheerfully back while the redhead sniffed back at him, turning his head. "Bit moody today, ain't he?"

"Just a bit." Minato replied mildly as Kushina strode forward, smiling brightly.

"Hey old man, heard you got some new equipment." Kushina greeted, exchanging a peck on the cheek with the band's producer.

Jirarya laughed, shaking his head. "I figured a pretty thing like you had an alternate motive for dragging the kids over here, yeah, let's go." He turned around, gesturing down the hall.

He led them beyond a complicated set of large hallways, the band passing by unaware of the grand scale of things, while Rock Lee bounced around, much to Gaara's annoyance.

"Would you knock it off?" Gaara snapped in perfect monotone at the green-clad boy.

"But Gaara-san! I'm checking for any blind spots in the security, and possible entryways and--"

"Argh! Shuukaku! Trade you…?" The redhead offered a bit pleadingly.

"Chill baby brother…You'll get used to it." Shuukaku shrugged in a mellow manner, twirling his drumsticks absentmindedly in the air.

"I don't know…" Gaara replied, his eye twitching as Rock Lee resumed with 'flanking' his left side. "I'm about to shove my Fender so far up his…"

"Here we are!" Jiraiya called out, gesturing to an ordinary-looking door. "Kyuubi, you wanna go in first?" He offered.

Kyuubi lifted a brow. "The last time I entered a room first, the place was trashed and my wrestling star of a mother almost landed Itachi in the hospital…wait, sure, why not, I'll go in first." He smirked at Itachi before stepping into the room, studying the state-of-the-art recording equipment with barely contained awe.

"It's so shiny…Iruka-sensei!" Naruto squealed, all but tackling the brown-haired man already seated at the long rows of knobs and slides.

"Naruto, it's been a while, how are you?" Iruka greeted, narrowly avoiding getting smacked in the face by the blonde's Yamaha. "Careful now, are you ready?"

"I'm fine!" Naruto chirped before nodding his head. "And I am!"

"Hello, Iruka." Kyuubi greeted a bit too warmly for Itachi's liking as the redhead peered into the recording booth. "Wow, roomy." He commented.

Iruka nodded his head. "We'll let you warm up together." His fingers twitched possessively over the equipment. "Let's have a run through of both songs and then we'll record you all individually."

Sasuke blinked. "Why?" He asked curiously.

"Because, this stuff is shiny and new, and I like it." Iruka replied, a gleam in his eyes.

Jiraiya laughed. "Back in my day…" He began.

"Husband still beat their wives over the head with their clubs and dragged them home. But times have changed, old man." Kushina sent her snickering sons a wink. "It's the other way around now."

Minato cleared his throat. "Well, then, let's start. Everyone not needed, out please!" He glanced at the large group of bodyguards.

"Oh, let them stay, I offered because of the whole, search and destroy mission I had going on last night." Kushina stated with a wave of her hand.

Kyuubi sulked slightly before following the rest of the band into the recording studio and proceeding to help set up.

"You think someone would have it ready for them." Deidara muttered. Itachi shook his head.

"Kyuubi was always meticulous about his instruments, even in high school." He replied calmly, watching through the glass as Kyuubi bent over slightly to adjust the mike stand to his height.

Lovely.

"So," Kyuubi called out, looking at the glass. "One time for each song and then we'll break for individual recording?" He asked.

Iruka nodded, buzzing the group. "Yup, that's right, so let a rip."

Shuukaku grinned. "Masquerade first." Kyuubi blushed, sending Shuukaku a fierce glare.

"Oblivion."

"Masquerade."

"Obli--"

"Kyuubi'll be too embarrassed to make it through Oblivion second if we make him sing Masquerade first." Gaara noted calmly. Shuukaku pouted.

"Oh, fine." He replied moodily, still grinning. He clicked glanced about the room. "You guys ready?" He asked.

"I'm good." Gaara stated.

"Yup!" Naruto chirped. Kyuubi sighed, closing his eyes before taking a deep breath.

"Alright." He replied.

Shuukaku leaned back, clicking his sticks together four times before Gaara sent up a string of low eighth-notes, his fingers plucking the strings easily and he ran up and down an octave.

On a hidden cue Naruto let out a loud D Minor Chord, letting the sound echo as Shuukaku began beating the bass drum in a quick, steady beat that matched Gaara's.

Kyuubi absentmindedly pulled the mike from its stand, taking two steps back before tilting his head back and began to sing.

_Feathers scattered along your path,_

_Blood-tipped wings spread for flight,_

_The world grows dark as sunset falls,_

_Your sword held high to fight our fight,_

_Halo cracked and dull,_

_The earth bleeds beneath your feet,_

_Robes stained with the filth of Death,_

_Marching to the war drum's beat._

Shuukaku increased the tempo of the bass drum beats, mixing in sharp, loud cracks on the snare, in perfect sync when Gaara and the bass player let low, mournful note, Naruto's guitar flying past them and the blonde rolled up an octave before moving into the notes of the chorus.

_Angels fall from the sky,_

_Wings break as souls cry for Light,_

_Demons rise from the ground,_

_Save me from this Oblivion._

_Fight back, the men will die,_

_Demon blood black as night,_

_The clash of metal drowns out sound._

_Deliver me from this Oblivion._

Kyuubi paused to take a breath, pushing his hair out of his eyes, letting the other instruments ebb down from the louder chorus into a calmer, more moody flow before he continued.

_Watching slowly from the Shadows,_

_Are you safe? Little one?_

_Clinging to the stiff cold woman,_

_Is that your mother, forsaken one?_

_Poor lost babe, crawl to me,_

_Into my arms, you may fall,_

_Let me whisper to you the sweet songs of misery,_

_Let your blood drip down the wall!_

Kyuubi held out the last word, letting his voice go on to get a throatier sound that a more than considerable amount of girls had joined his fancult for. He cut off, Naruto, Gaara and Shuukaku, taking on the second Chorus, the lead singer joining them on the second Part.

He grinned, controlling the urge to laugh as Naruto began a complicated series of crescendos and decrescendos, his fingers flying over the neck of the guitar in barely controlled energy, releasing a wailing guitar solo.

Naruto let out a few accented chords in tandem with Shuukaku's crashes, the two members exchanging grins before the two joined Gaara in careening into the final chorus..

Kyuubi nodded his head with the crashes, closing his eyes and leading the band in the last chorus. He paused as Naruto and Gaara let out a lower note at the same time, before playing the same note an octave higher.

_Deliver! Deliver me from…_

The band erupted into a rising series of beats that could drown out an airplane.

_OBLIVION!_

_______________________

May: There you go, May's first Rocker song mixed into a fanfic lol, don't be too cruel with reviews.

Also, May would like to note. She is not in the band, she is also guessing that several of her readers are not in bands. That's why she's gone and kept the music lingo on the minimum, lol.

Even if May was in a rock band, she'd end up playing synth or keyboard. Because she is merely a Pit Percussionist. Lol.


End file.
